Who can relate to the frustration you feel when a friend who keeps complaining about a certain problem never listens to any of your ingenious solutions?
Okay, admittedly it might be a bit presumptuous to think that you might have the genius to come up with a live-changing solution after a 3-minute assessment of their situation. But the frustration derives from the fact that they will never ever even TRY anything.
One of my most important life mottos has always been to keep expanding my horizon and don’t limit myself.
When I was a 12-year-old aspiring visual artist, I created a clay painting perfectly encapsulating the essence of the meaning of this endeavor.
‘You are in a cave with a group of people. It is dark inside but there is a promising view of a bright and colorful world outside through the cave exit. One person dares to jump outside to see what it is like.’
I’ve always tried to be that one person. Travelling the world, tasting all types of weird and different foods, trying out new adventure sports & excercises, checking out new gadgets, listening to the latest releases and experimenting with different diets.
What Does the Motto Encompass?
Let me break down what exactly this motto encompasses for me.
Keep Trying New Stuff
This is something that comes very naturally to me. I absolutely love trying new things. Whether this is a snack of fried crickets sold by a street vendor at a bus stop in Mexico or a rope swing across a river…… To me it adds excitement and color to life. However, I do realize that it is not everybody’s character trait and to some people it does not come naturally to step out of their comfort zone to try something new.
Whether we are born neophiliacs or not we can probably all think of a situation when we were terrified to do something different, something abnormal for our personality.
For me these would definitely involve social situations like public speaking or joining a group of strangers. I’m not a very outgoing person and group situation definitely make me very uneasy.
When my partner David suggested to me to join the local book club I was absolutely petrified and came up with as many excuses I could think of why it would never work for me. The most obvious ones being that the book club consisted of mainly older ladies who had nothing in common with me because they were from a different age group and other than books had completely different interests than me.
How did I know this? I didn’t obviously, because I had never even met these ladies! And there is my point: most times you won’t know what something is like until you try. Only then can you shape your opinion. Maybe you were right all along and it wasn’t the right thing for you. But at least now you know for sure.
Luckily in the case of the book club I was completely wrong. It broadened my horizon immensely to join a group of people with different interests and ages and also helped me to improve my character flaws of intolerance and prejudice.
Strive To Always Improve in Everything You Do
‘Have no fear of perfection – you’ll never reach it.’ – Salvador Dali
I love this quote because it helps me to remind myself that I will never be an expert at anything. It takes away a lot of the pressure because there is no end goal in sight that must be reached, but it also means that I can always improve and do better. I must never stop trying to reach perfection.
The first step of improvement is to simply acknowledge this.
You could start with something basic like breathing. You have been doing this since the second you were born. Yet there are many ways to exercise and improve your breathing during your daily routines. The same goes for standing, eating and sleeping.
Secondly, we need to convince ourselves that ‘improvement is good’.
If I can never reach perfection wouldn’t the most logical step be to not try at all? Think about it. This would mean standing still, stagnation. Isn’t the most fundamental principle of life growth?
Self-improvement gives my life purpose and meaning. My belief is that if I become better, everything around me becomes better too.
The third step is to constantly remind ourselves to improve and to try implementing it on everything we do.
Most of us have incredibly busy lives these days and it is so easy to forget in the turmoil of family and work duties. The best thing we can do is to practice constant awareness and mindfulness.
I especially enjoy practicing self-improvement when I’m exercising. Instead of just running along thinking of what I’m going to cook for dinner that night I really focus on my running form and pace. The way I place each foot in front of the other, how I breathe, what my posture is like. It all matters and can be improved.
Keep Looking for Inspiration
A good way to achieve self-improvement is to listen to your inner voice. Your body and soul know best what is good for you. But sometimes we might get stuck and struggle to hear this voice. It might have become overshadowed by habit?
Therefore, I believe it is equally as important to always look around ourselves to seek inspiration. It also requires constant awareness because it can be found in the most unexpected.
I used to be in the habit of enjoying nature by rushing through it, focusing mainly on the achievements of reached destinations and the awards of spectacular views. When I started to take my children along to share my passion for the outdoors, it didn’t take long before they were teaching me to see everything in different ways. They made me slow down and look at the small things and the details.
My children have forever been my source of great inspiration.
What Does the Motto Not Entail?
Having looked at all that this motto means to me I think it equally important to touch upon some possible misinterpretations.
No Reckless Leaps
I obviously don’t recommend to take leaps into the unknown until you’ve carefully considered the possible outcomes. That means not making reckless, ill-considered changes that might be dangerous or have irreversible consequences.
You might fall into the trap of internalizing the motto so that you act thoughtless. For example, I’ve always really wanted to be able to do a back flip on the trampoline and several times I’ve come very close to ‘just doing it’. Luckily, I’ve always been sensible enough to remind myself that there is a pretty good chance of me landing on my neck and causing some serious injury if I attempt such a difficult move without any assistance.
Sometimes the act of trying something new could mean we will lose what we already have. This would probably be the case if you tried for a new job or a new sexual relationship. If a change will possibly result in a loss, then you obviously want to be quite certain that it is a necessary change to make.
Impossibility of Return
Many people won’t try something new, because they are too worried that they will be seen as a failure if they don’t stick with it. It does seem like a much better character trait to not give up too quickly, to see through what you’ve started. And admittedly it sometimes takes a little while to get into something before you can start to enjoy it.
However, there should be no shame in saying: ‘I gave it my best shot but it just wasn’t for me.’
After all there might even be a positive outcome from a failed trial. It might make you appreciate ‘the old’ more. Or it might even lead you to something completely different and unexpected.
Not Living in the Moment
Don’t focus so much on a change you are going to make at some point in the future, that you fail to live in the present. Many times, in my life I’ve fallen into this trap. I used to be a keen traveler, working hard for a few years to save up for an upcoming trip. As soon as I had my next trip organized and a departure date in sight, I would have such a hard time to enjoy life. Going to the office day after day would become the most repetitive and tedious slog.
The truth is though, however mundane or difficult your life may seem it is possible to find beauty in it. Even if it is just in some small moments.
Summary
Too many people typecast themselves. They put themselves into a certain box, close the door on themselves and find it hard to find a way out.
How often do you hear somebody say: ‘I’m just too old for that’, or ‘I’m just not the type to do this or that’.
“Change is the only constant in life” – Heraclitus.
It means the world is always changing and so are people. We age for example. But aging doesn’t necessarily entail limitation but might just involve adaption.
Never lock yourself into a box unless you can truly and honestly say that it makes you happy to live in a closed box.
This world is just too beautiful and has too much to offer to lock yourself away from it.
